Sunday, February 21, 2010

Do you think the guy who owns American Apparel

... would take offense if he knew I'm making an Easter burlesque costume out of an American Apparel tank dress and ten yards of fringe, which I'm dyeing green?  I was in there the other day buying the dress and a couple of thongs and chatting with the nice young man who was ringing my purchase up, telling him American Apparel thongs are what I always use on stage and that they're the very best for my purposes.  He said he had a feeling a lot of strippers shop at American Apparel, because where else would you wear certain things like the aluminum foil-colored hot shorts that they sell?  I often laugh at the pictures on the American Apparel website catalog.  It's like the next generation is entirely made up of total hootchies!  And they've been running a pretty amusing "best male/female ass" contest recently, to find the owners of the derrières that will be their new models.

I think American Apparel should hire me as a senior citizen spokesmodel.  I can't tell you how much of their stuff I wear in real life or adapt for the stage; love the colors and simple designs.  But knowing that an elderly burlesquer is wearing the same clothes might be a buzzkill for the young hipsters!

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